Fifth Sunday after Pentecost. Octoechos Tone 4. Holy Martyr Agrippina.
Apostles’ Fast.
Romans 10:1-10. Matthew 8:28-9:1.
Read Romans 10:1-10
We are made for relationship. We can’t live without it, but we can’t give it to ourselves – we need others. That puts us in a difficult position when we experience the trauma of rejection. A common maladaptive behavior is to attempt to make ourselves bulletproof by our perfect behavior and becoming defensive over any indication that we are less than perfect. By denying and hiding our vulnerability, we don’t leave room for the other person to love us as we are, and we miss out by not receiving the other person as they really are.
It is not uncommon to experience trauma in our relationship with God, not because God is abusive or unloving but because the human condition raises difficult questions, and we lack knowledge. When God judged Israel for sin with the Babylonian captivity, it was not a rejection, it was covenant faithfulness, fulfilling the covenant’s curses (as well as its blessings) with a promise of restoration. Much of official Israel’s response to God upon return, though, was not to find in the Law (as St. Paul does in support of his arguments) the grace of God through faith, but to attempt to obtain righteousness themselves through adherence to it.
For Christian believers, Christ is the end of the law for righteousness. But that doesn’t mean that we are any less susceptible to “seeking to establish (our) own righteousness, (and) not submit(ing) to the righteousness of God.” In response to the hits we take in life, we can self-protectively think that we are earning God’s grace – a contradiction in terms. Being honest with God in confession and receiving Him in the Eucharist allows us let God love us as we are and experience the joy of trusting Him by receiving Him as He really is.